The value of maintaining a posture of curiosity when going into an interracial dating situation rather than fear or frustration. What the book of Relevation says about the way people of all cultures connect. Why you need to identify core cultural values and customs so you can communicate these with your partner. How dating someone of another culture can trigger feelings of loss. The beautiful opportunity to create a new culture as you blend your life with another person.
During this podcast episode, we talk a lot about communication. Pretty meta, huh? Grab it now so you can take your communication skills to the next level! Are you subscribed to our podcast? If not, subscribe today on iTunes or Stitcher so you never miss an episode! We would also be so grateful if you left us a review over on iTunes so other people can join the conversation and explore Christian dating just like you. Just click here to review in less than 15 seconds.
You can click the star ratings obviously a 5-star hehe and "Write a Review" to let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is. Thank you so much and we'll see you next week on the podcast! Communication Tips from We Date Modern. Most first dates take place in a pub and generally involve drinking …sometimes a lot of drinking.
Casual sex on first date is not the rarest occurrence but is also not the norm. Parents involvement in the dating life of their children tends to be even less than in most American families. In India, arranged marriages are definitely not a thing of the past and the modern twist to that are the dating apps. There are many dating apps strictly designed for the Indian dating scene but here is the catch…the dating apps are for parents to match their children. Once a match happens based on multiple considerations of finance, religion, casts… is followed by calculations of the birth dates of the two potential partners matching, auspicious dates, numerology, family compatibility before a first date which sometimes happens during your wedding day.
Dating in Indian is an entire science and a community effort. You are definitely not left alone and things are not left to chance. Dating culture is generally always with the idea of marriage in mind and Indian culture has definitely never warmed up to the idea of casual dating. Despite Indian men being very good at bargaining, once they date they tend to be extremely generous with their women and take a very traditional role of protector and provider of the home.
In Indian dating culture, there is this concept that women have to always be wooed and pampered. Dating in France can be so casual that French do not even have a word for date …. But French people also manage to avoid the dreaded talk in which a couple has to "define" the relationship — AKA the USA conversation where we decide if we are exclusive. For the French, the mere act of going on dates or, rather, "seeing someone" , being affectionate generally means that you're committed to someone.
French tend to be a lot more romantic in dating so if a French feels like this is serious and finds out you are seeing another in the same time the reaction can sometimes be disastrous. In general dating culture in Russia and across Eastern Europe is much more old-fashioned as gender roles remain quite clearly defined. On a date Russian men are expected to be highly courteous , holding doors, helping with coats, taking the bill and bringing flowers …always in odd numbers.
It is thought that the woman completes the bouquet with her beauty, as opposed to an even number, that is only taken to the dead. Russian men tend to be very generous from the beginning and marriage and moral values are definitely engraved in the dating culture. There are no strict rules on how fast or slow the relationship leads to marriage. In response women are expected to be very loyal, very affectionate and supportive; also the physical aspect of a woman counts much more.
Women put a lot more value on their aspect, on femininity. Do not be surprised if a Russian or Eastern European woman will start bringing up her cooking skills or qualities of a traditional wife in the conversation sometimes again not all women nor all men will be the same…I personally have no cooking skills…the reason why my father believes I am still not married at First dates in Japan are very different from the Western world where two people meet for a movie, or a coffee or dinner.
First dates usually happen in a group meeting — or goukon. PDAs are frowned upon and the most you could expect from your Japanese partner at the end of a wonderful romantic date might be a stiff hug. Tokyo Psychoterapits Dr. Ana Maloyan-Kishida explained that "Ways in which feelings, and love in particular, are expressed in Japanese dating culture can lead to frustration.
Foreigners expect more direct verbal expression and physical contact, whereas the Japanese partner may not feel comfortable with this kind of expression. Nonverbal communication, subtle signs are highly valued in Japan and if they are not noticed by the Western partner, frustration and resentment follow". However Japanese take dating very seriously and the point of dating is to get married.
Now ladies, China might be the place to be if you are planning to get married. As of there has been a significant gender imbalance within the country and that was one of the reasons why the one child per family rule was canceled. Since parents chose to keep only boy children slowly the demographics have started to look worrying.
The pressure of getting married in Chinese culture is higher than most other countries and marriage markets are common. Parents therefore are very involved in the dating scene. The younger generations are actually the first ones to even have a choice in whom their partner will be so be patient. While in the West the rule is to play it cool and not call for days, in China is common to text and call multiple times a day sometimes , even from the very beginning of the relationship.
So the chances of learning how true Vikings date are high when visiting Iceland. First interesting fact is the fact that dating is not traditionally practiced , nor the pressure of labeling a relationship. One night stands are common but here is why. Iceland is so small that the chances of bumping into someone you know or are related to are high, so as soon as you go out is official and then people will start commenting if they see you on five first dates a month with five different people.
Chanel shares what she learned from dating and marrying her husband who is Nigerian-American. Why the conversation around cultural differences needs to be intentional particularly when people of color are dating someone who is white. The value of maintaining a posture of curiosity when going into an interracial dating situation rather than fear or frustration. What the book of Relevation says about the way people of all cultures connect. Why you need to identify core cultural values and customs so you can communicate these with your partner.
How dating someone of another culture can trigger feelings of loss. The beautiful opportunity to create a new culture as you blend your life with another person. During this podcast episode, we talk a lot about communication. Pretty meta, huh? Grab it now so you can take your communication skills to the next level! Are you subscribed to our podcast? If not, subscribe today on iTunes or Stitcher so you never miss an episode! We would also be so grateful if you left us a review over on iTunes so other people can join the conversation and explore Christian dating just like you.
Just click here to review in less than 15 seconds. You can click the star ratings obviously a 5-star hehe and "Write a Review" to let us know what your favorite part of the podcast is. A counsellor will help you to think of ways you can reclaim parts of your old identity in a way that doesn't stop you integrating well into your partner's culture.
It is possible to hold onto your identity while embracing a new culture and, with the help of a counsellor, you can start to explore what makes you, you. After all, you are an individual and, while the culture you grew up in might have helped shape your identity, it does not own you - you are in control. There is no single formula for a happy, long-term cross-cultural relationship. Relationships are always different and what works for one couple might not for another.
Whatever challenges you face on your journey, whatever complications arise from the differences between you, it is important to always remember that there was a reason you started your relationship in the first place. It might become tainted, marred, or forgotten - but that reason will never really disappear.
Don't expect your partner to settle seamlessly into your way of life. Even if they're the foreigner and you're the native, you should see the relationship as a merging of cultures rather than that person adopting yours. Respect their differences, learn about them and look at where you might have to compromise to help them feel happy. Relationships should always be about finding a comfortable balance. If one of you isn't making enough effort, then cracks will start to form.
Visit each other's home country, learn one another's language even if they speak yours and read up about their religion and cultural history. If you're not interested, why are you with this person? Making the effort to get out there and experience life from their perspective shows that you care and that you want to know them better.
The issue of children can be a big one for cross-cultural couples. How do parents from different heritages instil a solid sense of identity in their child? Instead of seeing yours and your partner's separate cultures as two different identities, see your relationship as one.
Teach your children about both cultures and explore with them the differences between the two, focussing on how they work together and the positives that can be drawn from both. Rearing your children to be bilingual is also a good idea so as not to alienate one half of your couple.
Having a different perspective on life is a valuable thing - you have so much to learn from one another. See your differences as a good thing that enhances your relationship, rather than a stumbling block. A study by U. These were the most common:. Humour - The cure for so many relationship problems , humour enables people to be frank and refreshing about potential problems.
By poking fun at your partner's bad English, or unusual dinner table etiquette, you can highlight your differences in a way that draws you together. As long as you can take a joke yourself, humour is a great tool for overcoming potentially awkward situations. Cultural deference by one partner - Often one partner will adopt the language, customs and attitudes of the other to make the relationship work.
Blending of values and expectations - Finding common ground in the beliefs and values of each person's culture is a good way to find a happy medium. Cultures are rarely incompatible with others - all it takes is a little education, understanding and compromise. After all, we're all human. Appreciation for other cultures - Cross-cultural couples who have an appreciation for global travel and different cultures generally fare better than those who don't. Having a natural interest in anthropology, history and exploration means the relationship takes on an inquisitive dynamic - each partner is always keen to learn something new about the other, which keeps them together and prevents their differences from becoming negative.
In couples counselling, you and your partner will be encouraged to talk about your respective backgrounds. You may be asked to talk about your past experiences before your partner came into your life, and you may be encouraged to think about the following:. How can you balance your own cultural beliefs with that of your partner's? Can you find a suitable blend? A Diploma level qualification or equivalent in relationship counselling or a related topic will provide assurance and peace of mind that your counsellor has developed the necessary skills.
Another way to assure they have undergone specialist training is to check if they belong to a relevant professional organisation that represents couples counsellors. Counselling Directory is not responsible for the articles published by members. The views expressed are those of the member who wrote the article. For the most accurate results, please enter a full postcode.
All therapists are verified professionals. In , I was sexually abused by the restaurant owner who had befriended my family on holiday. I was nine years old. People talk about having a 'light-bulb moment'. A moment when something switches on in your mind, a torch is shone in Louise Thompson, known for the glamour and glitz of Made in Chelsea, is more than meets the eye.
Relationship problems. What is cultural identity? From a young age, the information we absorb from the world around us influences our: ideas about how to behave sense of self-worth thoughts about what's right and what's wrong aspirations and interests values - the importance of things in life i. Some lifestyle disagreements include: Eating and drinking - Different cultures have different views on alcohol consumption and diets vary greatly around the world.
Clothing - Sometimes people change what they wear to fit in with another culture. Religious differences If you fall in love with someone who doesn't share your religious beliefs, how do you get around the fact that you might have different fundamental ideas about life? Some of the main religious issues in cross-cultural relationships include: Incompatible beliefs - Two people might love each other for other reasons, but if a couple can't agree on fundamental values, conflicts can arise.
Dealing with religious differences in cross-cultural relationships Religious differences don't have to signal the end of a relationship - having conflicting views about the world can be a healthy and enlightening experience. Language barriers Language is an important part of communication, but it is not actually necessary. While a shared first language is not necessary for a happy romance, not having one can bring up challenges in the long run, including the following: Humour - A lot of humour is verbal; could you cope with your partner not understanding your jokes, or you not understanding theirs?
Dealing with language issues in cross-cultural relationships Counselling can help to improve communication pathways between couples, even when those couples don't share a first language. Make sure you: Make the effort - Even if your partner is a foreigner in your country, by taking the time to learn their language you can show that you want to be a part of their world as much as they've become a part of yours.
Loss of identity If you've moved to a different country, changed religion, or sacrificed your own culture to embrace your partner's, you may begin to feel a little departed from the person you used to be. You might wonder: Who am I? Where do I belong? Do I fit in here? Do I have a responsibility to hold on to my cultural heritage?
Advice for cross-cultural relationships There is no single formula for a happy, long-term cross-cultural relationship. Here are some tips for avoiding challenges in cross-cultural relationships: 1. Understand, respect and compromise Don't expect your partner to settle seamlessly into your way of life. Get first-hand experience of each other's cultures Visit each other's home country, learn one another's language even if they speak yours and read up about their religion and cultural history.
Pass on both cultures to your children The issue of children can be a big one for cross-cultural couples. Think positively about your differences Having a different perspective on life is a valuable thing - you have so much to learn from one another. Coping strategies for conflict in cross-cultural couples A study by U.
These were the most common: Humour - The cure for so many relationship problems , humour enables people to be frank and refreshing about potential problems. How does counselling for cross-cultural issues work? You may be asked to talk about your past experiences before your partner came into your life, and you may be encouraged to think about the following: What brought you two together in the first place? What's good and positive about the relationship? How do your differences impact your relationship?
How do you envision the future? What do you want from the relationship? What values would you want your future children to have? If appropriate.
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How to overcome cheating? Dealing with fear of commitment. Dealing with adult separation anxiety. How to overcome trust issues? How to deal with loneliness in a relationship? Read more about online marriage counseling. Take me to the homepage. For more information, please scroll down. Skip to content. Facebook page opens in new window Twitter page opens in new window. Cross cultural relationships. Mr Von Hippel says that while there is no evolutionary or biological reason why some people favour a certain race, he says a positive attitude about a group of people and the opportunity to meet someone from a different background is an "enormous predictor of who we end up with".
We always mixed, but not far enough to encounter really different people. It's very much a privilege of the modern world that I can meet somebody whose group lived thousands of miles away from my own," he says. And race can guarantee that you end up with a phenomenon of 'hybrid vigour'. Two different types of corn can be bred together to create a stronger variety.
Two humans with no overlap in their genetic history are less likely to have genetic mutations. Mr Stephen agrees: "So a person of mixed race whose parents are very, very not related, the chances of parents having same disease genes is very, very low. People of mixed race are going to be more attractive. You could also predict that we ought to be attracted to people of other races as then means our children would have this benefit, but that seems to be less supported by the evidence.
Mr Von Hippel predicts that as the world becomes a multi-ethnic place, the eventual consequence is going to be much more multi-ethnic coupling. But at the end of the day, sometimes you just can't explain who you're attracted to. You might think you have a type, but then fall in love with someone unexpectedly. In this episode of Insight we hear from people who only date those from different racial backgrounds to their own. Host Jenny Brockie asks about the basis for their preferences and finds out whether racial stereotypes are at play.
The program also hears from match-making services that specialise in cross-cultural matches. Doctors 'flocking' to vaccine program, as Greg Hunt says they face no legal risk for giving AstraZeneca jab. People from all backgrounds are being encouraged to take part in Australia's Census. Why controversial and 'widely rejected' changes to the NDIS have Australia's disability community worried. More than 20 workers trapped in flooded mine in China's Xinjiang region.
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